Almost Killed In The Safety Office

This morning I had to go to the safety office. As I entered the single-story building, one of the safety inspectors was standing outside smoking a cigarette (duh!). Inside was the secretary and another inspector working at his computer terminal.

Just as I finished my business the inspector who'd been outside came in and told us that we had all just barely escaped being killed. We thought he was making a of joke. But no. Outside, 80 or 100 feet away, a tanker truck with a load of compressed oxygen was filling the yard storage tank. According to the inspector, who had witnessed the event, one of the landscapers contracted by the yard drove his riding mower under the trailer of the oxygen tanker. Apparently the tanker was parked athwart the roadway, blocking it. But - - so claimed the inspector - - the landscaper had not one but two lit cigarettes - - one in his mouth and one in his hand (talk about rednecks!), and the pure, medical grade compressed oxygen is highly explosive. Smoking in the vicinity when it's being transferred from one container to another is a real no-no. The truck driver took off running. With landscapers like this, who needs Al Qaida?

The safety inspector said that security guards were escorting the two-butt landscaper out of the. This is the last time I'll ever come to the safety office, I said, and they all laughed. Gallows humor.